If you have not already done so, please read Blog Posts 1 through 5 that describe how sleep is important and beneficial. I will post specific information for parents and children based on my book, “Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child.” Please do not be put off by my book’s length. This is a reference book. Read only the topic of interest to you.
Q: What is the Weissbluth Method?
A: The brain is the only organ in the body that requires sleep. Parents are responsible to make sure this need is met. Think of healthy sleep like healthy food in the sense that there is good quality food and junk food. Just as parents don’t look at just the number of calories consumed, parents should not look at just the number of minutes or hours asleep.
Healthy Sleep for Children is composed of five main elements:
These five elements interact with each other so parents need to be mindful of all five.
Respecting your babies need for healthy sleep is a core principle. In practice:
At any age, sleeping in synchrony with circadian sleep rhythms produces better quality sleep. Use your child’s natural sleep rhythm as an aid to help your child sleep well.
Q: How should a new parent be preparing for their baby?
A: Coparenting is the manner in which parents work together to raise their children. Within the context of specific family circumstances, to achieve healthy sleep, focus on teamwork. High positive coparenting quality elements include:
When positive coparent quality is high, parents’ ability to deal with bedtime issues and nighttime awakenings is greater. This emphasizes the importance of communication and concordance in nighttime parenting practices.
Q: What are the signs of baby fatigue?
A: Drowsy signs are the early warning system, signaling that you need to start the soothing process to sleep. Then, sweet sleep is almost guaranteed. Fatigue signs occur when you were too late and finding sleep might be tough.
Moving into the Sleep Zone. Moving away from alert, calm and relaxed.
These behaviors are most noticeable when the child is in a quiet and relaxed environment, for example, when being read to. They might be less apparent in a stimulating environment such as a busy mall or when he is in front of a television or screen-based media device. Or they might not be noticed because you are distracted by looking at a screen or on a phone call.
Try to begin soothing before you notice changes in the eyes.
Entering Overtired Zone. Becoming overtired. Moving toward irritable and tense.
The most common mistake made by parents is mistaking fatigue signs, which come late, with drowsy signs which appear early and signal the rising of the sleep wave.
(To be continued.)
Hi Dr. Weissbluth,
My son will be 5 months next week and is overall a good sleeper. I’ll explain his schedule then ask my questions. Up until this past Tuesday his schedule looked like this, starting at bedtime:
Bedtime: 7:00pm
Wake for feeding between 4:00 and 5:00am
Return to sleep until 8:30 or 9:00am
Nap 1: using drowsy cues around 10:00 or 10:30 am till noon
Nap 2: noon until 1:30 or 2:00pm
Nap 3: 4:00pm until 5:00pm
This past Tuesday, I decided to start waking him up earlier, 7:30am, to encourage an extra feed during the day in hopes that it would lead to him dropping his 5:00am feed and sleep through the night. However the result of this is not what I expected over the last 5 days. His new schedule looks like this:
Bedtime 7:00pm
Wake for 1 feeding between 10:30pm and 1:30am.
Return to sleep till 7:30am and then wake for the day.
1st Nap 9:15am till 11:00am
2nd nap 12:45pm till 2:00pm
3rd nap 4:00-5:00pm.
I realize this new schedule is less sleep for him so I don’t know if that has contributed to this change in habit. I am struggling to balance getting enough feedings in with getting enough sleep. I breast feed him when he wakes for the day, before and after his first nap, before his second nap, before his third nap, and before bedtime he is given a bottle to ensure a full feed.
Any ideas on why the change for overnight feeding time from 5am to late night feeding instead?
I know it is developmentally appropriate for babies of this age to still feed overnight, should I hold off on trying to wean the overnight feed at this point and see if he is able to naturally come off of it on his own?
Because of the multiple variables, I need to ask, have you read any parts of my book?
Currently, I have read chapters 1 through 5. I guess I am wondering if I’ve created a sleep debt? We did start with an earlier bedtime several weeks ago, around 6pm that he had for sometime and worked our way to 7pm for the last 4 weeks. With the 6pm bedtime though, he was waking twice through the night to feed as he ended up missing one day time feed. We have tried a gradual extinction for these night wakings but he is truly hungry he takes a full feed quickly and goes right back to sleep when he’s placed back in his crib.
Thank you.
Please describe his mood and behavior when alone with toys (no screens or parental involvement) between 6-7pm.
Please clarify the 7pm bedtime. What time do you think he actually is asleep at night?
Does he have normal weight gain?
When you awoke him at 7:30am, what exactly changed?
He’s very playful, he likes to use his voice, until about 6:15 when he becomes quiet and stares off into the distance. This is when we start his bedtime routine with a bath, bottle feed, change, story then in crib between 6:50 and 7:00pm. Dad does the bedtime routine with him. I would say he is awake in his crib for a maximum of 15 minutes but usually within 10 minutes he is asleep. By 7:15pm he is asleep. Generally no crying when he is put down.
He does have a normal weight gain. He is in the 20th percentile and has been consistent in that curve.
When we changed to a 7:30 am wake up, his naps became more consistent but his overnight sleep changed from uninterrupted until 5:00am for a feed to uninterrupted until only around 11:30pm to 1:30am for a feed. He returns to sleep uninterrupted until 7:30am. So, with the 7:30am wake up his overnight feed also adjusted to earlier.
My opinion, which is based on experience but not data, is that when parents attempt to control the sleep (or feeding) schedule by waking the very young and well-rested the child from sleep, it backfires.
My suggestion is to go with the flow regarding sleeping and feeding. When drowsy, sleep him and when hungry, feed him. Children after 9 months of age do not need to be fed at night.
I know this is not much of an answer to your question but in the long run, I think it’s my best thought.
Your thoughts?
Ok, so leaving him to wake on his own in the morning then? The rest of the day is generally using cues so his naps are around those given times. As is feeding however I am finding those cues more difficult to discern as he gets older, that is something we are seeing a lactation doctor for though.
Thank you for the advice!
At 5 months of age, children are taking two major naps: midmorning and mid-day +/- a third midafternoon nap. They are usually fed upon awakening in the morning, around the two major naps (+/- around a third nap) and bedtime. Typically, they are fed around the middle of the night and maybe very early in the morning or only once at night, or not at all at night. Using a bottle at night and monitoring the volume and time required for the feed will clarify whether or not she is truly hungry at night.
Good evening, my twins, 17 months, it is very hard to put them to bed for night sleep. They stand up, cry a lot, want to come out…terrible. Darina the Day they dont have any problems, they sleep twice a Day or once, depending on their mood. The other problem is that they wake up veeeery early, around 5am no matter what time they go to bed in the evening.
Im soooo desperate, thank you for your answer.
Have you read my book, ‘Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Twins’?
No, I havent read it.
Healthy sleep in twins is challenging and I think that reading this would give you more information to understand how to hep them sleep better and help you formulate a more focused question to me.
Hello! We are still having trouble with early wake ups a month after daylight savings. No matter the time we put him to bed he wakes at 5/5:30am. He used to sleep great…6:30/7pm until 6:30/7am. Naps are great and he goes to sleep easy & stays asleep during the night. Any help would be appreciated!!
What is his age?
Does he have self-soothing skills?
Please describe a typical 24-hour sleep schedule.
Describe his current mood and behavior when alone with toys (no screens or parental involvement) during the 60 minutes before he falls asleep at night.
He is 22 months old. He has his binki- he put himself to sleep. Normally* he would wake up about 6:30/7am, he would take a nap between 11/-12pm and sleep for 2 hours, he would take a bath and bottle at 6:15/6:30pm and then be laid down and asleep at 6:45/7pm. He would sleep 12 hours. We have tried different bedtimes but nothing seems to help- his sleep latency seems to be longer as well no matter the bedtime. He is normally in a good mood before bedtime.
Please read pages 81-84 to fully understand why cumulative sleepiness, from a bedtime that was a little too late, may have developed and caused ‘his sleep latency seems to be longer as well no matter the bedtime.’ plus the earlier wake-up times.
Also carefully read, Blog Posts 159, 171, 172, and 204 to fully understand presleep arousal and the opposite: sleep begets sleep.
A trial of 4-5 nights of a slightly earlier bedtime might clarify what is going on and help with the early morning wake-ups. I suggest you do everything you normally do but about 20 minutes earlier so that he is put down around 6:15-6:30pm during the trial. Monitor latency to sleep and the wake-ups.
How does this sound?
The last day he slept normal was the day before daylight savings! That is the only thing that has changed.
Okay. 6:00/6:15 has been the pretty consistent time for about a week now (minus a couple nights due to events). Should we try like lying down by 5:30 then?
Please consider a trial of 3-5 nights of a strict 5-5:30 falling asleep time (he has been bathed, fed, and soothed and you have put him down drowsy but awake and are leaving the room at 5;00-5:30pm) and monitor latency to sleep, crying, wake-up time, and naps.
Okay we will try and super early bedtime! We are just hoping to try and at some point scoot his time back to normal.