NAPS
(Continued.)
There are five main elements of healthy sleep for children:
- Sleep duration: night and day (Blog Post 6).
- Sleep consolidation (Blog Post 11).
- Sleep schedule, timing of sleep, bedtime (Blog Post 8).
- Sleep regularity (Blog Post 12).
- Naps
Why Naps are Beneficial For Babies and Children
- Naps Reduce Stress: Levels of cortisol dramatically fall during a nap, indicating a reduction of stress in the body. Not taking a needed nap means that the body remains stressed.
- Naps Enhance Emotional- and Self-Regulation: In toddlers of 30–36 months, Dr. Rebecca Berger experimentally eliminated a single nap. She noted that when only one nap is eliminated, “acute sleep restriction causes dampened positive emotion displays when positive responses are expected (solvable puzzle), as well as increased negative emotion under challenging conditions (unsolvable puzzle).” Experimental acute nap deprivation revealed that “toddlers [were] neither able to take full advantage of positive experiences nor as adaptive in challenging contexts. If insufficient sleep consistently ‘taxes’ young children’s emotion responses, they may not manage emotion regulation challenges effectively, potentially placing them at risk for future emotional/behavioral problems. Specifically, when children were given the opportunity to complete an age-appropriate puzzle, they showed less joy and pride when sleep restricted than when optimally rested. When children were faced with a puzzle with no solution, they showed significantly more worry/anxiety when sleep restricted than when well rested. In sum, Dr. Berger continued, “sleepy children may view and respond to the world differently than children who are well-rested: they may not be able to take full advantage of positive experiences and may not be as able to manage challenges. A lack of sleep in contexts that rely on young children’s mastery of new information (e.g., preschool) may have significant and potentially dire long-term consequences [Emphasis added].” See Blog Posts 15 and 50.
A study of children 3–5 years old examined the effect of experimental nap deprivation and showed that naps influence emotional processing. “Without a mid-day nap, attention to emotional stimuli is heightened and may impair the child’s ability to regulate emotions.” A video abstract of the article can be viewed at www.youtube.com/watch?v=JIoZ8mzxQgg.
Upset and frustrated when challenged. More emotional. Sound familiar? Now I think we know why children who miss their naps are more likely to have meltdowns or frequent witching hour problems. You can ask yourself, what is the magical power of a nap that turns a raving, manic, out-of-control 2.5-year-old into a sweet Prince Charming?
- Naps Modulate Temperament: My study of naps showed that at 4 months of age, longer naps are associated with the temperament characteristics of a more positive mood and longer persistence (Blog Post 48).
At 3 years of age, longer naps are associated with the temperament characteristic of more adaptability. Comparing 3-year-old children who napped with those who did not nap, adaptability, and only adaptability, was the temperament characteristic associated with those who napped. Adaptability rating was the temperament characteristic that had the highest correlation with total sleep duration. Also, adaptability was the only temperament characteristic correlated with the number of night wakings: more adaptable children had fewer night wakings. Finally, more adaptable children scored lower on a rating scale to measure ADHD behaviors.
Other research has shown that adaptability is the temperament characteristic most important for school success.
- REM Sleep Occurs During Naps: Not only are naps different from night sleep, but not every nap is created equal. There is more rapid eye movement (REM) sleep in the midmorning nap compared with the midday nap, in adults. During a nap, the duration of REM sleep within a nap, not simply the total duration of the nap, is related to creative problem solving. Research also suggests that high amounts of REM sleep, under the influence of low melatonin levels, help direct the course of brain maturation in early life. Further, adult studies have suggested that REM sleep is especially important for restoring us emotionally or psychologically, while deep, non-REM sleep appears to be more important for physical restoration. See Blog Post 15.
- Naps Consolidate Memories: Recent studies have shown that sleep following exposure to new knowledge is beneficial for memory consolidation in early infancy. Dr. Horváth showed that 3-month-old infants remembered a cartoon face about one and a half to two hours after its first presentation only when a nap followed the learning. That is, the nap consolidated the memory. “Infants who did not nap after the learning showed no evidence of remembering the stimulus previously shown, whereas those infants who napped did remember. We propose that frequent naps during infancy are necessary for the efficient consolidation of information.” Another study by Dr. Horváth showed that children between 7 months and 3 years old who had more naps (but not longer total daytime sleep durations) had higher levels of vocabulary growth, suggesting that memory consolidation with frequent naps is better than with fewer but longer naps. In a similar study, by Dr. Konrad, among 15- and 24-month-old infants, those who were able to nap after a demonstration session were less likely to perform an irrelevant action for achieving a desirable outcome. This suggests that the nap selectively helps to discard aspects of a learning experience as being not useful or relevant (“pruning” Blog Post 50). In two other studies of 12-month-olds, Dr. Conrad confirmed the ability of a nap, following a demonstration, to improve performance, presumably due to memory consolidation. She wrote, “There was a significant positive relation between the number of naps during the retention interval and the imitation scores, suggesting that infants rely on frequent napping for memory consolidation.”
So please respect your infant’s need to nap, based on drowsy signs, even if naps occur frequently throughout the day. In addition to frequent naps enhancing memory consolidation, an experimental study on 15-month-old infants showed that naps less than thirty minutes do not promote memory consolidation. Please don’t worry if your baby has some very brief naps, but by watching for drowsy signs during the day and in the evening, when you synchronize your soothing-to-sleep to the time when your baby is starting to become sleepy, most naps will be more than thirty minutes.
(To be continued.)
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Our almost 6 month old is struggling with naps hard! We’re trying the nap drill this week and he’s getting three 30-minute naps a day, but is clearly overtired. One struggle is that third nap keeps ending about 4:30 or 5 so then there’s no time to put him down early. How can we get him on a good schedule that will work at his babysitter’s house during the week too?
At 6 months of age, 84% of children take 2 naps and 16% take 3 naps.
At 9 months of age, 91% of children take 2 naps, 5% take 3 naps, and 4% take 1 nap.
Because of your child’s age, consider eliminating the 3rd nap and temporarily move the bedtime super early, perhaps as early as 5:00-5:30pm. Perhaps start this on a week-end when both parents are available to help soothe through a temporary rough patch around 3-5pm. The super-early bedtime should help him awake better rested which will help him nap longer. When that occurs, over the next several days or few weeks, then the bedtime can safely be shifted to a later hour based on drowsy signs. Read about the ‘5:30 rut’ if you wind up stuck with a too early bedtime and a too early wake-up time. Leet me know how it goes.
Sweet Dreams,
DrW
Thank you! Should we stick with the “nap drill” of 60 minutes in the crib while we make that adjustment too?
Yes.
Chapter 5, ‘Sleep Solutions’, in my book describes in detail how to choose and implement age-appropriate changes that will help your child sleep better. Simultaneously focusing on all aspects of sleep (the wake-up time, naps, the bedtime, overnight sleep, self-soothing skills, parental consistency, and so forth) is often necessary. A single simple suggestion, such as moving the bedtime earlier, may or may not be helpful. Whenever a change is made, allow 5-10 days to see if it was worthwhile before making another change. Trial and error may frustrate a parent, but patience and persistence will pay off!
So the nap drill did not work for us even after 10 days. We went back to being consistent with naptime routine and doing what we could to make sure he got at least some sleep. A couple weeks after he hit 6 months, they just came together. He’s not 9 months and things have been pretty consistent with typically 2-3 hours of naps per day and early bed times only if afternoon nap doesn’t happen for some reason (teething, sleep regression as he tries to walk, etc.).
Congratulations. I started my nap study when babies were 6 months old because naps become more regular and longer between 4-6 months! Check out my Instagram posts (#marcweissbluth) where I discuss all your parenthetical items as ‘Fake News’.
Hi Dr. Weissbluth, our 11 month old has been sleeping well through the night since about 9 months(roughly 12 hours a night, we try to have him in the crib by 5:30 pm but it’s sometimes 6:00; he’s usually up between 6:15 and 6:45 am). My concern is that he has not been taking his second nap. He usually takes a morning nap for 1.25 – 1.5 hours(we attempt to have him in the crib by 9:20 but are sometimes a little later). We try to put him down for a second nap around 1:30(at the suggestion of our sleep trainer who was trained by the sleep institute). He usually just sits in the crib for an hour though and doesn’t sleep. Do you have any recommendations for us to try? Thanks very much!
A. Experiment with a shorter interval of wakefulness after the first nap for 3-4 days and if needed, then a longer interval of wakefulness for 3-4 days.
or
B. Read the section on transitioning from 2 naps to 1 nap and consider a single nap going forward.
Please give me a follow-up note.
Thank you I’ll do that and let you know how it goes:) Do you think I should put him down earlier than 5:30/6:00 until I sort out the second nap? If he seems tired he could go to sleep as early as 5?
Temporarily, 5 might be okay.
Hi Marc
Trying to read through all your content and book, thank you for the wealth of information.
I used extinction for bed time when my son was 8 weeks. He is now 19 weeks and the overtired cat napping cycle is driving me insane!
I’m trying desperately to get into a routine but I don’t know how as 2 days are never the same. I find it hard to notice drowsy signs and am often distracted with my toddler. By the time I see them he is crying and up set when starting the nap routine. Once he is in his cot, he does not cry but rather passes out for being tired I suppose.
I try aim for a 6pm bed time each night, he sleeps well with 2 feeds but lately his last feed (around 5am) will not resettle and starts our day then leaving him tired by 6.50am
Today our day was
5.30am wake and feed (wouldn’t resettle)
7.30am 1st nap 40 min
10am napped 20 mins in pram while out
12.30 napped 40mins – tried to resettle with dummy
2.30 difficulty going down for sleep, napped 30 mins
He is always fussy and tired in the afternoon
He falls asleep independently but lately I have been resorting to giving him pacifier to try and extend his naps
Thanks for reading
Please be patient with naps. Naps mature between 4-6 months of age. The early bedtime will help. Please send me a progress report in a few weeks.
Thank you I will 🙂
I have a 2 year 3 month old child who was napping perfecting up until last week. I would nurse her until drowsy, place her in her crib in a dark room with a sound machine. She’d sleep 1.5-2.5 hours. She is asleep at night by 6:45/7pm. And wakes up between 6:30/7pm. Last week I had to take her to her grandmas, where she refused to nap (she used to nap there just fine). Since then, she screams and cries once I place her in her crib relentlessly. Once for 2 whole hours. I do not go in to soothe her. I don’t know what to do. She only naps in the car now, and fights the crib only during naps, no issue at night. Please help!
Perhaps a ‘reset’ after not napping at grandma’s last wee would have prevented all of this.
Now, not napping well means the combination of the ‘nap drill’ and a temporarily earlier bedtime based on drowsy signs should help a lot.
How does this sound?
Hi Dr. Weissbluth,
My 14, almost 15, month old (who has always been a very consistent and good sleeper and always slept a ton) began having trouble with his 2nd nap of the day and nighttime sleep around 13 months. Previously he was on this schedule:
6:30 am wake
9 am nap (usually 1-1.5, sometimes 2 hrs)
2 pm nap (1-1.5 hrs)
6:30 bed
He is almost 15 months (Christmas) and the past two weeks we’ve experimented with transitioning him to 1 nap. We’ve been gradually pushing the morning nap (+15 min intervals) such that it is occurring at 10:30 currently.
It seems to be backfiring. He has only been sleeping 1 hour at that nap. We’ve offered catnaps around 3 or 4 since he starts getting overtired in the afternoon, but he just stands in his crib. Also nighttime sleep has gone down the drain. We’ve moved bedtime earlier (5:45-6), but he just wakes up at 5 am or earlier screaming. Also waking randomly throughout the night. All of which is completely out of character.
Not sure where to go next! We have a 3 month newborn at home too, who we are doing extinction with and that’s going well at least! I just hate to see my 15 month old so tired all the time, it’s breaking my heart that I can’t solve this problem for him.
Any advice would be hugely welcomed!
Transitioning from 2 naps to 1 nap is sometimes rocky and involves trial and error. Since the single nap is now occurring at 10:30, maybe, for now, the 5:45-6pm bedtime is too late. Please try a temporary strict 5:30 falling asleep time until the nap is successfully moved to the mid-day (try to do this over 3-7 days). Then, depending on when that nap occurs and how long it lasts, the bedtime might be moved later (based on drowsy signs). It might stay at 5:30-6:00pm and not return to 6:30pm because of less total day sleep. During this transition. he may get up around 5ish but I would not go to him to start the day any earlier than that out of fear of creating an early morning wake-up habit. How does this sound?
Thank you so much, will give it a try and let you know how it goes!
A month and a half later checking back in…. We have got him to 1 nap now.
His schedule is now:
6:30 am – intended wake/out of crib
11:30 or 12 noon NAP
6:30 pm asleep
But there seem to be two lingering issues we aren’t sure how to deal with…
1) about 75% of the time he only takes a 45 min-1 hour nap. The other 25% of the time it’s 1.5-2 hours. The days it’s longer, things go much better. A few times when he had a cold a week or so ago, if he woke after 45 min we went in and let him sleep on top of us on the bed since we felt it was extra important he sleep. Those times he was definitely still tired and able to sleep another hour or 1.5 on us. So I know he NEEDS more than 45 min. Whereas before this all started he would often wake halfway through a nap and resettle, if he wakes now it’s almost immediate screaming.
2) almost every morning he’s been waking at 5 am screaming and standing in crib. We’ve tried different things… leaving him to cry it out (he doesn’t go back to sleep typically just continues to cry). A couple times went in to calm him and tell him to go back to sleep (doesn’t work). A few times got him up, took him downstairs and cuddled on couch (fell back asleep). We’ve been doing the “red for bed” and “green for wake” night light signals (we don’t leave it on all night, just at bedtime and then green goes on at 6:30 am). I would like to know what’s best to do as I feel like a need a consistent approach so he knows what to expect.
I’m not sure what’s causing this. Maybe separation anxiety? Afraid of dark? Simply more aware? He’s only 17 months though. This is such a 180 from him being the ideal sleeper through 14 months.
Any thoughts are welcome!
Does the “6:30pm asleep time” occur routinely, that is, on almost all nights? Is 6:30pm the beginning of the bedtime routine or the actual falling asleep time. Please clarify when the bedtime routine begins and when he actually falls asleep.
We keep the same exact bedtime routine nightly:
6:10 begin routine
Change into pjs, milk, story time, brush teeth, in crib at 6:30 pm
Falls asleep immediately
Please describe his mood and behavior between 5-6pm when he is alone with toys (no parental involvement and no screens).
After dinner (he eats at 5) he usually gets a burst of energy and wants to play with his toys on the floor or crawl around the kitchen.
Blog Post 171 describes his “burst of energy” as a pre-sleep arousal that tells you that his current bedtime is too late causing him to wake up too short on sleep to have good quality naps every day. This bedtime might have been fine when he was taking two naps a day on a regular basis when younger. I suggest that you move his bedtime to 6:00pm, if he falls asleep promptly, that is proof that 6:30 was too late. Perhaps, when regularly having long naps, the bedtime might shift to 6:15pm. On the other hand, if he falls asleep easily around 6:00pm, but regular long naps do not occur, then try a regular bedtime of 5:30pm: Observe latency to sleep at night and nap quality. Even if he wakes up in the morning a few minutes earlier, the earlier bedtime will produce better quality sleep. Please keep a record and let me know how it goes. Does this help?
So to confirm, if we do. 6 pm bedtime , should we aim for out of crib in the morning is 6 am? Or still 6:30 (and if 5:30 bedtime then 5:30 am?)
Will give it a try!
There is no “aim for out of the crib” time. The wake up time may be a little earlier or later or unchanged. The quality of sleep sleep (related to early bed times) is more important than just sleep duration. Let me know what happens over the next few days.
With the 6 pm bedtime he’s woken at between 4:45-5:15 am crying/screaming the last 5 days. He has fallen asleep around 6:15-6:20 pm. Naps have been 1.5 hours. Generally, post-nap he seems in a pretty good mood. Mornings, however, he seems very unhappy, clingy, and tired. I would describe his morning wake ups as “inconsolable.” Even when we go in, pick him up, and give him lots of hugs and kisses he just cries. Between 5-8 am crying occurs on and off, with tired signs. Could separation anxiety be the cause?
Previously, you wrote:
But there seem to be two lingering issues we aren’t sure how to deal with…
1) about 75% of the time he only takes a 45 min-1 hour nap. The other 25% of the time it’s 1.5-2 hours. The days it’s longer, things go much better. A few times when he had a cold a week or so ago, if he woke after 45 min we went in and let him sleep on top of us on the bed since we felt it was extra important he sleep. Those times he was definitely still tired and able to sleep another hour or 1.5 on us. So I know he NEEDS more than 45 min. Whereas before this all started he would often wake halfway through a nap and resettle, if he wakes now it’s almost immediate screaming.
2) almost every morning he’s been waking at 5 am screaming and standing in crib. We’ve tried different things… leaving him to cry it out (he doesn’t go back to sleep typically just continues to cry). A couple times went in to calm him and tell him to go back to sleep (doesn’t work). A few times got him up, took him downstairs and cuddled on couch (fell back asleep). We’ve been doing the “red for bed” and “green for wake” night light signals (we don’t leave it on all night, just at bedtime and then green goes on at 6:30 am). I would like to know what’s best to do as I feel like a need a consistent approach so he knows what to expect.
I’m not sure what’s causing this. Maybe separation anxiety?
Am I correct that the previous nap issue is resolved?
Because you mentioned ‘separation anxiety’ twice, I suggest you talk to your pediatrician or some other professional about this.
Regarding the early morning issues, previously you were inconsistent about ignoring versus giving attention, are you still inconsistent?
Based on his nap and drowsy signs, do you think the bedtime routine starting time should be moved earlier or later?
Hello, my three month old has begun fighting daytime naps. Even when he is soothed to sleep and then set down in his crib, he often doesn’t sleep more than 15-30 minutes at a time. I’ve been searching the book for tips on how to combat him fighting naps. He’s clearly tired throughout the day and he’s a bear to get to bed by the end of the day. He usually goes to bed between 6:30 and 8 pm depending on his last evening feed and usually sleeps well through end night, usually only waking us up once to eat between 2 and 5 am depending on the night.
Help!
Please describe his mood and behavior when alone (no screens or parental interaction) between 5-6pm?
Does he have self soothing skills?
He doesn’t have many self soothing skills yet. He’s just starting have some. He can sooth himself back to sleep at night when he’s drowsy but is usually unable to sooth himself to sleep during the day. When he doesn’t nap well, he is irritable all the way through bed time. He’s usually not alone between 5-6 pm because he often feeds then and we are giving him a bath or reading to him as part of his bed time routine. After the book he is rocked to sleep in his swaddle and carried to the bassinet in our basement bedroom for the night.
Today I laid him down for a nap around 9:30 AM and he woke up about 15 minutes after he laid down, he cried for a few minutes, then ceded and played to himself in the crib for a half an hour before screaming again. I tried to put him down for another nap at 11:30 because he was so tired. He woke up right after I put him down. I let him cry for 40 minutes before he fell asleep for another 24 minutes and refused to go back to sleep.
Focus on night sleep for now because night sleep rhythms start at about 6 weeks of age and day sleep starts around 3-4 months of age and is well organized by 6 months of age.
Review drowsy signs.
Move the bedtime earlier to about 5:30.
Practice ‘drowsy but awake’ and leave the room at bedtime at night.
Review the chapter on sleep solutions for night sleep and pick one.
For now, go with the flow for day sleep.
How does this sound to you?
Thank you for the prompt response. We will try out what you suggested. Thank you very much.
My 13 month old has started nursery and since then has been struggling with his naps. At the weekends he wakes at 7am, naps 9-1030am and again 130-230/3pm and sleeps at 7pm. I have asked nursery to mirror this but they have said he’s resisting his morning nap. Last week they managed to get him to take two naps but the morning nap required 40minutes of soothing which they said they cannot do daily.
At nursery he ends up having one 90minute nap anywhere between 1130-130pm. When we pick him up at 530/6pm he’s exhausted. We’ve tried getting him to sleep as soon as he gets home about 630pm but he’s waking up earlier at 6am. Last night he woke up at 245am for an hour. I’m not sure what to do. At the weekends do we revert to our old nap schedule that works? This is his 3rd week at nursery and we had been reverting to his original nap schedule in the hopes he would rest more which had helped. Is there anything we can do during the week other than hope he has a longer nap at nursery?
Thanks for your help.
At 12 months of age, 80% of children take 2 naps, but at 15 months, it’s 40% and at 18 months it 20%, so your expectation is that he will go to a single nap over the next several months.
Naps at nursery may be problematic so your strategy is to move the bedtime earlier, even 10-20 minutes earlier over time, will help. You might walk into your home, and immediately bathe, feed, and soothe him to sleep without any playtime and have playtime in the early morning. Another idea is to be very strict with week-end sleep and do whatever works to maximize week-end sleep.
How does this sound?
That’s great thank you.
At weekends do we just let him sleep as long as he wants? I have been waking him up after 2 hours so as to avoid affecting the afternoon nap. We will also try and get him to bed as soon as we get in from nursery.
“At weekends do we just let him sleep as long as he wants? I have been waking him up after 2 hours so as to avoid affecting the afternoon nap.” Good idea. Try to protect his naps on weekends and use a super early bedtime based on drowsy signs.
Hi, my son is 3.5 months old. At bedtime we have been practicing drowsy but awake since he was about 4 weeks old and he has developed great self soothing techniques and was falling asleep independently. The last 2 weeks he has had a harder time doing so and we plan to “Let cry” method in the next week. His bedtime is around 6:45-720 depending on his last nap and cues. I know in your book you said that naps don’t consolidate yet, but his naps are getting extremely short and he is waking up very angry and upset from all his naps. We have him do all naps in the crib. He is showing signs of being over sleepy all wake windows (fussy, angry). We do find if we pick him up and rock him to extend the nap and he wakes up after a longer nap that his mood is better. Is this creating bad sleep habits for naps?
Please describe in detail his mood and behavior during the 60 minutes before bedtime when he is alone with toys (no parental involvement and no screens).
Following his last nap that ends around 530 he is typically fussy, doesn’t like to be put down, not smiling. He was diagnosed with a cow milk protein allergy a few weeks ago and we have seen some improvement in his temperament overall and in the evening.
When does he usually wake to start the day?
Please describe a common nap schedule, both times of onset and durtion.
He usually wakes up around 7. Currently his sweet spot for being drowsy and going to sleep quickly is around 1.5hrs. He falls asleep fairly independently in his crib within 5 min of self soothing. On his own he sleeps for around 40-50 min and when he wakes up most times is upset (crying, not wanting to be put down, not overly interested in toys). If I rock him he will usually go back to sleep but at this point is hard to transfer back into the crib. I have let him cry for about 10 min to see if he will self soothe back to sleep before I pick him up, but he does not seem to. If I extend his nap by rocking to 1.5-2hrs he wakes up smiling, ready to play, calm, relaxed. After another 1.5hrs he is ready for another nap. Before bedtime although he is more irritable, he usually doesn’t fall asleep for about an hour 45 after his last nap. Yesterday he did 2hr 15 min nap (45 min indep nap extended with rocking), 1.5hr nap (all indep in crib), and hour nap (30 min indep, 30 min extended rocking). He fell asleep for bed independently and no tears after 1hr 45 wake window and slept 5 hours before waking to eat, and then slept 3hrs and then 2 hrs before getting up for the day. We have yet to implement any formal sleep training since we have been following your principles and it works 85% of the time. We hope to do the let cry method soon to get closer to 100% success rate. However the short naps seem to affect his temperament negatively, but he doesn’t seem to be able to always indep connect sleep cycles during nap.
Please clarify:
“He fell asleep for bed independently and no tears after 1hr 45 wake window”
“bedtime typically 1hr 45 min later.”
This suggests to me that your bedtime or expected falling asleep time is based on a “wake window” and not drowsy signs. Is this correct? If so, why do you do this?
Sorry I reread your question: a common day if 730 wake up: nap at 9 (2hrs-2.5hrs), 1ish (1.5 hrs), 4ish (1hr), and bedtime typically 1hr 45 min later.
His drowsy signs on average appear around that amount of time currently. Not watching the clock persay, but that’s what made sense to me when describing his schedule.
Please describe in detail his mood and behavior during the 60 minutes before his bedtime when alone with toys (no parental interaction and no screens).
He tends to be fussy after his last nap and 60 min before bedtime he requires a lot of parental interaction to limit crying. Without interaction he seems not content, and will cry. But again, if he wakes up on his own from a nap his temperament is worse. If we extend the nap by picking up and holding for remainder of nap until he wakes up again, his behavior is content and he will kick around, make happy sounds, smile.
Wake windows are bogus.
Because his falling asleep time is too late, he has pre-sleep arousal (read Blog Posts 159,171,172, and 204): “He tends to be fussy after his last nap and 60 min before bedtime he requires a lot of parental interaction to limit crying. Without interaction he seems not content, and will cry”
The too late bedtime means that his night sleep duration is too short so he wakes up short on sleep and that in turn causes his naps to be messed up. He has accumulated a sleep debt. “The last 2 weeks he has had a harder time doing so”
Continue to provide mid-morning and mid-day nap opportunities and do whatever works to maximize sleep and minimize crying around these 2 naps. But no new nap will start after 3pm. If he is asleep then, do not wake him. He may need extra distraction and soothing in the late afternoon.
Move the bedtime temporarily to 5:30pm (he is bathed, fed, and soothed and you are leaving the room at 5:30pm). If he is hungry at night, feed him. If not, do extinction or graduated extinction, if you and your husband are comfortable with this.
As naps improve over several days, based on drowsy signs, the bedtime might be moved back a little to a later hour.
How does this sound?
Thank you for your help! We will definitely try this. The internet (social media) is filled with a bunch of bad info and I appreciate your help!
Hello! I have a 12 week old and this is our 2nd baby implementing information we learned in our book. We credit our toddlers happy demeanor and intellect on prioritizing his sleep. Thank you!
We have a question about our 12 weeks old. He goes to daycare. Because of this the 1st nap is sometimes longer interval of wakefulness than recommended. He’s often tired or falling sleep briefly in the car and then gets 2nd wind around serving to daycare. His typical wake up time is 6:30. He gets drowsy around 8-8:30 and he’s not getting his first nap at daycare until 10-1030. This is causing issues with naps and nighttime sleep.
Would you advise moving his wake up/day start time earlier (like 530-6am) to try to accommodate a quick nap at home before daycare?
Please complete his sleep schedule:
Hw wakes up 6:30am
He is sleepy around 8:30 but naps at day care around 10-10:30. The duration of this nap is:___
His next nap is ____ (at day care or at home?)
He falls asleep at night at______
Describe what happens overnight.
The first nap starts between 10-1030. The duration typically 45-60 min. Next nap is typically 2pm and lasts about 30 min. Most days he has two naps at daycare. Sometimes he will have a nap around noon duration 30-45 min. These are all at daycare. He goes 5 days per week. His bedtime is 6pm
He overall seems tired on daycare days. At night he false starts waking up about every 45-1hr until 9pm when he then goes to sleep until 2 am for breastfeeding. Then sleeps from 2am until wake up. He falls asleep on his on at bedtime. He returns to sleep some on his own and other times we have to soothe back to sleep from the 6-9pm period.
Typing this out I am wondering if I should ask daycare to accommodate three naps a day based on drowsy signs and have them offer a lunch nap? I also still wonder about waking him earlier to get nap prior to ten am.
Because of “He overall seems tired on daycare days.” from the short total nap duration, he develops pre-sleep arousal in the late afternoon which causes him difficulty in falling asleep and staying asleep at night. Immediately switch to a 5:30pm expected falling asleep time (he is bathed, dressed for sleep, fed, soothed, and you are waking out of the room at 5:30pm). Do this for 4 nights, keep a written record of sleep, and report back.
Discuss with the day care staff about his need to take a morning nap that must start earlier (around 9ish) and the second nap starts earlier also and let me know how accommodating (or not) they are.
If you need to read several Blog Posts that explain my advice, let me know.
Thank you for the response. Just to clarify. Move to an earlier 9am nap. Do you think just two naps at daycare is sufficient with moving bedtime to 5:30pm or also additionally requesting three naps in addition to earlier nap times?
If a 3rd nap at daycare starts before 3pm, that would be great.
Hi Dr. Weissbluth,
I would love your opinion on my 20-month-old son’s sleep schedule. He typically falls asleep for the night between 5:30 and 6:00 pm. He wakes around 6:00 am but usually stays quiet and doesn’t signal until closer to 6:30 am.
His nap time doesn’t have a very fixed schedule, it usually falls somewhere between 10:00 and 11:30 am. Recently, I’ve been trying to push the nap a bit later, past 11:00 am. However, when I do that, he tends to cry more before falling asleep and the nap ends up being shorter.
Do you think I should leave his schedule as it is with the earlier nap time, or would it be better to gradually continue pushing the nap later?
Your son’s sleep schedule looks promising, but before I can give you a specific recommendation, I have one important question.
Between 5:00 and 6:00 p.m., what do you observe in your son? Specifically, I want to know whether you are seeing drowsy signs or fatigue signs — and the distinction matters.
Drowsy signs are subtle and easy to miss. In a quiet environment, with no screens or sibling activity, your son may become slightly less animated, lose interest in his toys, grow quieter, or seem to look through you rather than at you. These are the early signals that his brain is ready for sleep. They are easy to overlook, especially if the environment is stimulating or you are occupied with something else.
Fatigue signs are what appear when that drowsy window has already passed. These are more obvious: rubbing his eyes, pulling his ears, becoming fussy, clingy, or irritable, or shifting into a slightly wired or hyper state. Fatigue signs mean the optimal moment for sleep has been missed and neurological arousal is already rising.
If your son is showing drowsy signs closer to 5:00 or 5:15 p.m., then 5:30 is likely the right bedtime and 6:00 may already be too late — late enough to send him into the night with some accumulated arousal, which would then make it harder for him to wake well-rested and reach a well-timed midday nap. If his drowsy signs appear closer to 5:45 p.m., the current range is probably working well.
Take a few evenings to observe him carefully in a calm, quiet setting — alone with toys, no screens, minimal stimulation — and watch for those early, subtle signs. That observation will tell us what we need to know.
Hmm I’d say that around 4:00–4:30 pm he starts yawning a lot and gets quieter. Sometimes around 5:00 pm he seems to get a bit of a second wind. But he always goes down very easily at bedtime, no matter what time we put him down. He never resists bedtime.
I’m going to pay closer attention to the specific signs he shows between 5:00 and 6:00 pm. It seems like when he takes a shorter nap, his afternoons are more rocky. He’s always very alert and happy in the mornings, but after his nap if it’s less than an hour, he usually becomes more easily grumpy and has lower energy in the afternoons.
If he takes a really long nap, though, he’ll have a very happy and energetic afternoon and then bedtime will be later (like closer to 6:30). The problem is that when he falls asleep later at night, he tends to wake up much earlier the next morning, so it’s hard to know how to balance everything!
Your observations are helpful and the pattern you are describing is starting to come into focus. Before I can give you a specific recommendation, I need to understand the full picture a little better.
You originally asked whether to leave the nap where it is or gradually push it later. What prompted that question? Was someone — a pediatrician, another parent, something you read — suggesting that a later nap is better for a 20-month-old? Or is there a practical reason the earlier nap timing is inconvenient for your schedule? Understanding why you are considering the change will help me give you more useful guidance.
I also need more precise information about the naps themselves. How often does he take a short nap — less than an hour — and how often does he take a long nap? And when you say a long nap, how long do you mean? An hour and a half? Two hours? More?
If I remember correctly (please correct me if I’m wrong), in your book I was reading about the 2-to-1 nap transition, and you mentioned that initially the one nap might occur earlier in the day, but gradually, as the baby can tolerate it, you can move it later so it starts closer to noon.
For us, his nap time works perfectly fine, but if it were later, that would be fine too. I’m just not sure whether a midday nap would be better for him or help him take a higher-quality nap. I remember reading that babies have a natural circadian dip around noon, is that true/relevant?
I would say that about half the time his naps are less than an hour, usually around 50–55 minutes, and the other half are 70–80 minutes (rarely we’ll have a 30 or a 40 minute nap). He wakes up great when it’s 70–80 minutes. When it’s less than that, I can tell he’s tired during the afternoon. But then it’s that same problem I mentioned above… whenever he takes a good nap, he takes longer to fall asleep at night and then ends up waking earlier the next day.
Your memory of the book is correct. During the transition from two naps to one, the single nap often begins earlier in the day and gradually shifts later as the child matures and can sustain a longer wakeful period before needing sleep. Moving it closer to noon is the eventual goal for most children, but the timing should follow the child’s readiness, not a fixed schedule.
You are also correct about the midday circadian dip. There is a natural biological decrease in alertness around midday that makes that window favorable for sleep. So yes, it is real and relevant — a nap timed to coincide with that dip tends to be longer and more restorative.
Now, the pattern you are describing is worth examining carefully. Half his naps are 50 to 55 minutes and half are 70 to 80 minutes. The longer naps leave him happy and well-rested. The shorter ones leave him tired in the afternoon. That afternoon tiredness is telling you that 50 to 55 minutes is not fully restoring him at this age.
But here is the problem you have identified: when he takes a good long nap, bedtime comes later, and he wakes earlier the next morning. That earlier wake-up then affects how the next nap unfolds, and the cycle continues.
Before I can say more, I need to understand the timing more precisely. On the days when he takes a longer nap, what time does the nap start, what time does it end, and what time does he actually fall asleep at night? And on the days with a shorter nap, the same question — when does it start, when does it end, and when does he fall asleep?
The progress you are describing in one week is remarkable. Two solid naps of 1.5 to 2 hours, a happier morning and midday, and the frequent night wakings largely resolved — that is exactly what a well-timed early bedtime makes possible. You have done the hard part.
To your first question: yes, stick with the 5:30 bedtime. The afternoon moodiness you are still seeing tells you his sleep tank is running low by late afternoon, which means the early bedtime is still necessary. As his naps continue to consolidate and he accumulates more fully rested days, the afternoon moodiness should gradually diminish. The 5:30 bedtime is doing its job — do not move it later until the afternoons are consistently smooth.
To your second question: at 8 months, waking around 4 or 5 a.m. after a 5:30 bedtime is a stretch of roughly 10 to 11 hours without eating, which is a long time for a baby this age. A quiet, dark, prompt feeding that gets him back to sleep is entirely appropriate right now. You are not creating a harmful habit — you are meeting a genuine nutritional need at a biologically reasonable interval.
As he approaches 9 months and his sleep consolidates further, that early morning waking will likely shift later on its own as his overall sleep becomes more efficient. If it persists past 9 months and you have reason to believe it has become habitual rather than hunger-driven, that is the time to reassess. For now, feed him, keep it calm and dark, and let him return to sleep.
You are on the right track. Keep going.
Do you agree?
— Marc Weissbluth, M.D.
Please write a brief narrative account of the sleep issue before we began and a brief narrative account of what has transpired. Then I can better see the big picture to go forward.
His nap starts at different times each day and vary in length. The amount he protests before falling asleep also varies a lot, sometimes none, sometimes hard crying. Looking back at all my data, there doesn’t seem to be any clear pattern.
However, bedtime is very consistent. He always goes down easily, sleeps at least 12 hours, and often lies quietly in bed for 10–40 minutes before signaling in the morning. He’s a very happy and energetic baby.
I apologize if you already answered this: On the days when he takes a longer nap, what time does the nap start, what time does it end, and what time does he actually fall asleep at night? And on the days with a shorter nap, the same question — when does it start, when does it end, and when does he fall asleep?
Oh, I’m not sure what happened to my comment where I wrote out his sleep data for the past week. This is what I have recorded:
Feb 21
Awake: 6am
Nap: 9:28-10:10
Asleep: 5:23
Feb 22
Awake: 5:30
Nap: 11:00-12:04
Asleep: 6:00
Feb 23
Awake: 5am
Nap: 10:05-11:27
Asleep: 5:40
Feb 24
Awake: 5:53
Nap: 10:40-11:10
Asleep: 5:30
Feb 25
Awake: 6:00
Nap: 11:52-12:31(cried hard ~10 min before falling asleep)
Asleep: 5:45
Feb 26
Awake: 6:18
Nap: 12:07-1:01 (cried hard ~ 10 min before falling asleep)
Asleep: 6:00
Feb 27
Awake: 6:00
Nap: 10:58-11:53 (cried a few min before)
Asleep: 5:50
Feb 28
Awake: 6:00
Nap: 9:15-10:08 (car nap)
Asleep: 5:47
March 1
Awake: 6:00
Nap: 12:02-12:52
There’s not much of a pattern. His naps always start at different times
How about deliberately not allowing an early nap, say no nap before 10:30am. And each subsequent day add 15 minutes to this plan so that over 6 days, the nap is starting at 12 noon. He will need soothing and distraction in the late morning and if the nap is brief or does not occur, also in the afternoon. The bedtime will be 5:30 pm or later based on drowsy signs. If you begin this trial, try it when you know that there will be no car naps and maybe youir husband will be around to help with the soothing.
How does this sound?
Sounds great We’ll start tomorrow. Thank you so much!
I read your book, and thanks at least in part to it, my baby (4 months and 1 week corrected age, 5 months and 1 week actual age) sleeps quite well! My question for you is about managing the third, shorter nap of the day. Some days I find the start of the third nap pushing 4pm, which starts to be a little late. For example:
6:15 pm – bed
11 pm – feed
3am – feed
8:00 am – woke up
9:45 am – 11:45am nap 1
1:40 pm – 2:30 pm nap 2
4:00 pm – 4:45 pm nap 3
6:15 pm – bed
As 4:00 approaches, he is almost ready for a nap, but it’s still early drowsy signs – and if I put him down at 4 to keep it from getting too late, he doesn’t fall asleep until 4:10 or so anyway. This doesn’t happen every day – just on days where he sleeps later (i.e., in the morning he usually wakes up anywhere from 6-8am, so this tends to occur when he sleeps till 8) and/or nap 1 or 2 ends up being a longer one (he is still working on connecting sleep cycles, so he usually sleeps for 40 minutes, then lays there awake for 20 minutes squirming around, and potentially falls asleep again at the hour mark). Do you have advice for how to manage the third nap on days like this?
How often does he take a 3rd nap?
Does the 3rd nap cause a sleep problem?
Please clarify your question.
He always takes the 3rd nap. When it starts this late (4pm), though, he ends up napping till 5 and then not getting tired for bed until 7 or later (and if I put him in his crib earlier, he lays there awake). I am worried about this starting to cut into his night sleep if it slips later, though I could just go ahead a try a later bedtime when this occurs and see what happens?
He has started waking up twice at night (the first time around 10 or 11, the second around 3) whereas he had previously been down to a consistent single feed around 2am (+/- an hour). I suppose I don’t know yet if this is a sleep problem (it has only been happening for the past 4 days), but I can track it to see if it persists?
Previously you indicated that the bedtime was 6:15pm; now it appears that is is “7 or later”.
If I understand correctly, the third nap is always taken but sometimes it occurs late and then the bedtime is late. If this is correct, how often does a late 3rd nap occur?
Yes this is correct. Usually we aim for a 6-6:15ish bedtime, following drowsy signs, but a late 3rd nap pushes this to closer to 7. This is happening 2x per week.
Based on his age, my general suggestion is to not let a new nap begin after 3:00pm.
When he is drowsy in the late afternoon, after 3:00pm), soothe and distract him and have a 5:30PM expected falling asleep time-he is bathed, changed, fed, and soothed and you are leaving the room at 5:30pm.
When he does not appear drowsy much in the late afternoon, always have an expected falling asleep time that is a little earlier than usual; say 5:45-6:00pm. This slightly earlier bedtime will fill his sleep tank and eliminate the twice a week problematic late afternoon drowsiness by producing better qualtiy naps, in general.
How does this sound?
This sounds good. Thank you!