If you have not already done so, please read Blog Posts 1 through 5 that describe how sleep is important and beneficial. I will post specific information for parents and children based on my book, “Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child.” Please do not be put off by my book’s length. This is a reference book. Read only the topic of interest to you.
Blog Posts 1–5 describe what constitutes healthy sleep and explain in detail the benefits of sleep for your child. They are based on Chapter 11, titled “Sleep Readiness”, in the United States of America Department of the Army field manual (FM 7-22). This official Army document describes what is healthy sleep and what are the benefits of sleep. Updated in 2020, it is based on empirical data using traditional scientific methods. “In brain health and mental functioning there is no such thing as too much sleep. The more sleep the brain gets the better it functions.” For example: Improved mental acuity, judgement, attention, understanding, learning, situational awareness, mood, resilience, general well-being, ability to remember and appropriately utilize newly acquired skills and information, faster response times, fewer errors, and fewer lapses of attention,
“The restorative effects of sleep accrue primarily to the brain and are primarily manifested as improved cognitive performance. Accordingly, it is especially important that leaders [Parents] and others engaged in higher-order cognitive tasks-such as mission planning, decision making, risk assessment, and problem solving-are afforded and take full advantage of opportunities to obtain adequate sleep. Planning for sleep in training and tactical environments is a leader [Parent] competency.
Insufficient sleep degrades the brain’s function. The more sleep the brain gets, the better it functions. The effects of inadequate sleep on brain function and performance are well-documented.
Insufficient sleep negatively affects not only cognitive performance, but emotional and social functioning. Adequate sleep promotes an optimistic outlook and social acuity, but failure to obtain adequate sleep on a regular basis makes a person less resilient to stress and stress-related disorders including depression.
In short, the brain has a physiological need for sleep, and sleep promotes the ability to think and maintain mental toughness. And the more sleep, the better.”
If you would like to get more expert baby sleep advice, be sure to subscribe to my blog today.
Dear Dr Weissbluth, for nearly 3 weeks now my 17 month old has been skipping her one and only nap. To make up for this sleep deficit I have been putting her to bed at 6pm, and while she sleeps for 12-12.5 hours at night she won’t sleep during the day. Is she getting insufficient sleep? What can I do to get her to sleep? i have worked hard to instill consistent sleeping habits since she was 6 months old – putting her in her crib, blackout curtains, white noise, same room temperature. i sacrifice 2-3 hours of my afternoon everyday to make sure she naps at home. I experimented with various wake windows, 5 hours, 5.5 hours, 5.75 hours, yet nothing I have done has yielded any success in getting her to nap. The thought of her delayed development due to lack of a day sleep is filling me with crushing anxiety. what can i do to help her nap?
The ‘Nap Drill’ (pages 289-297 in my book) is a method to establish or re-establish age-appropriate naps after 3 months of age. It describes what to do when your baby is between 3-6 months of age and separately, what to do differently after 6 months of age.
Also, see Blog Post 209.
Temporarily, move the falling asleep time to 5:30pm (she is bathed, fed, soothed, and you are leaving the room at 5:30pm).
Let me know how it goes.
Dear Dr Weissbluth, thank you for your response. I have been an avid follower of your book and have been using the nap drill as her 30 minute pre-bedtime and naptime routine. Still, nothing seems to have changed. 530pm- 6pm bedtimes have been her routine for at least a month now since her naps have been on and off. My concern is she may be sleeping too much at night, thereby encroaching into her day sleep. Is there any validity in this concern? Or do you think that she is incurring sleep deprivation severe enough to slow her cognitive development?
“The thought of her delayed development due to lack of a day sleep is filling me with crushing anxiety.”
“do you think that she is incurring sleep deprivation severe enough to slow her cognitive development?”
Because of her previous great sleeping and current great night sleep, do not worry about any permanent harm.
Please describe in detail her behavior and mood when alone (no screens or parental interaction) at specific times during the middle of the day and early afternoon at the times when she perviously napped.
Please describe in detail how you have approached the nap drill in your attempts to get a nap, that is exactly what you are doing in attempt to get a nap.
Thank you, I will gladly share the details requested:
Behavior and mood when alone: she is generally calm and rambunctious. after her post-naptime snack she wanders around her play area and looks for toys to play with, books to read. the only thing that sets her off is if she is denied certain objects that she gets hold of (e.g. sharpies, phones, tv remotes). at her age, she is not allowed any exposure to screens or digital devices.
Nap drill: 30 minutes prior to her putting her down at 12pm, she is brought to her room, the white noise turns on, blackout curtains close, she changes into her sleepwear, i read to her until 1155am, whereupon the lights go off. the room is pitch black thanks to the $1000 investment i made in blackout curtains. she is rocked for a few brief minutes before being put down in her crib, always while she is still wide awake, at 12pm. it takes her 5-10 minutes to put herself to sleep. at around 1225-1240pm, she generally wakes up and with the exception of a few lucky days, she has stayed awake after waking up from one sleep cycle. when she’s awake, she babbles to herself and rolls around the crib. she generally doesn’t start crying until around 145pm. i only enter the room to get her up at 2pm.
Please review “drowsy signs”; does she show drowsy signs before 11:30am?
Your description of “Nap drill: 30 minutes prior to her putting her down at 12pm” sounds more like a bedtime routine; please read The ‘Nap Drill’ (pages 289-297 in my book) and tell me if you are exactly doing this.
She does not show drowsy signs (yawning, fussing, staring into space before 1130am). At 1130am, she has just concluded her pre-naptime lunch and is just getting ready for her nap, during which time she is happily playing with a quiet toy or two while i am setting up her blackout curtains with the white noise on ahead of her naptime routine.
My understanding of the nap drills as outlined in the book are a choice of two approaches after baby falls asleep and the nap duration is less than thirty minutes – extending the nap by engaging in some intervention (shushing, patting, or rocking), or ignore and give him another 30 minutes. Failing that, abandon all attempt get baby nap.
My approach has been to leave her in the crib, no matter the outcome, from 12pm to 2pm, which means she is left in the crib for another 1.5 hours upon waking after the first 30 minutes of her nap, or the so called “Crib 90” method.
What do you think of this approach? when i have intervened in the past i have found that it leaves her fussier and more stimulated, while leaving her in the crib at least gives her some quiet time for the scheduled nap period.
If “She does not show drowsy signs (yawning, fussing, staring into space before 1130am).” why do you attempt to nap her then?
Depending on night sleep and individual variation, most mid-day naps start between 12-2pm with variable lengths. Is it possible that she would nap better with a later nap time?
Hi Dr Weissbluth,
That is the million dollar question! I have been going by conventional wisdom which says that toddlers at her age range (15-18 month) should be put down by 12pm for their midday nap, which is around 5-6 hours after her morning wake up. This is also what is considered the “normal” wake window for that age range. I definitely think she needs a later nap time, but how late without pushing her past the point of catching her second wind? What would you do if you were in my shoes, trying to figure out the ideal time for a midday nap?
Thank you so much!
As you know from reading my book, “I have been going by conventional wisdom which says that toddlers at her age range (15-18 month) should be put down by 12pm for their midday nap, which is around 5-6 hours after her morning wake up. This is also what is considered the “normal” wake window for that age range.” is absolutely contrary to everything I write.
I gently suggest that if you wish to follow other’s advice, please do; if you wish to follow the information in my book, Blog, and Instagram reels, please do. It’s your choice.
Hi Dr Weissbluth,
A quick update: i had success putting my daughter down for her nap by following her tired cues and putting her down at 1245pm, versus her usual nap of 12-1230pm (6.5 hours after morning wakeup). You are absolutely right that a 5 hour wake window does not apply to all infants/toddlers. Thank you very very much for the advice and help!
I am happy to try to help. Please consider writing a narrative account of your child’s sleep adventure and placing it here and I would post it as a Blog Post. Many mothers would respond better to your voice than mine. How popular are ‘normal’ wake windows and ‘conventional wisdom’ that is different from my point of view?
Absolutely!
After months of consistent naps, my toddler’s sleep suddenly regressed around 15 months. Despite trying various strategies, including early bedtimes of 6pm and extended crib stays (“Crib 90”), naps remained short. This made for many ruined weekends involving early microwaved dinners, evening tantrums, and even canceled outings for fear of pushing her past the point of overtiredness.
Frustrated and overwhelmed, I sought advice from Dr. Weissbluth. He suggested abandoning wake window schedules and focusing on my child’s tired cues.
By observing my toddler’s behavior, I realized her naptime was 45 minutes later than I initially thought. She needed 6.5 past her morning wake up time before being tired enough for her nap, well above the conventionally-recognized 5 hour wake window for toddlers aged 15-18 months. Following her cues, she began taking longer, more restful naps.
This experience highlighted the importance of individualizing sleep routines and trusting parental intuition over rigid schedules. While the one-size-fits-all approach of wake window schedules are often touted, , my personal experience showed that paying attention to my child’s sleep needs was more important and effective.
Dr. Weissbluth,
My son will be 9 months next week. His typical bedtime routine was going to bed between 5:00pm – 5:30pm and waking once during the night to eat before waking in the morning around 5:00am-5:30am. A few weeks ago, he started waking up twice during the night (9pm-ish and 3am-ish) to eat. I’m not sure what to do here. Do we let him cry it out both times or just one? Should he be sleeping through the night without any feeds at this point? I don’t want him to be hungry, but I’m also afraid we are creating a bad habit with feeding him each time he wakes. He typically naps 2-3 times per day. I read about dropping the 3rd nap, but he still gets tired. Would appreciate your insight.
PS – you were my pediatrician growing up… how things have come full circle!
In general, infants over 9 months of age do not need to be fed at night. If your pediatrician agrees, choose a sleep solution and let me know how it goes.
I am doing a survey of former patients who are now parents to see if there are carry-over sleep-related parent behaviors for their own children. May I include you?
You may send your contact information with a mention of me to Deb Pedrick at familysleep@gmail.com and she will forward it to me.
Dr Weissbluth,
My 22 month old is a mess. She is tired, whinny, rubbing her eyes, yawning. We put her down promptly at 530pm. Bed, story, snuggles, lights off and out the door by 530-535.
She sleeps for 45-60 minutes and then wakes up crying. Falls back asleep (sometimes 40-60 minutes) and wakes up an hour later crying. The other day its was 3:30-4am before this cycle ended.
Wakes 7-730
Nap 12-1:30
Bed 530
What am I missing?
Between 5:30pm and 7:30am, what do you do?
We set a stop watch for 20 minutes. If she’s still crying—Ill go in rock her for 5-10 minutes, sing her one lullaby and put her right back down. It is 50-50 chance that she will go back down within 5 minutes. If my husband goes in it’s significantly less likely.
Please look at the Chapter Sleep Solutions and choose a solution that comports with your values and I will try to help you.
My 18m old was awake from 230 until about 4am. He’s not crying—just babbling VERY loudly. Im certain the entire family is awake.
Im assuming this is a bedtime issue? I put him down just before 6pm.
He was awake around 7am, napped 12-2:15 and went to bed around 6pm.
He was quite a mess (crying/clingy) around 4-430 but I had a hard time figuring out if he was hungry or tired. Admittedly by oldest just started kindergarten this week so my attention was extra divided during this time since she just got home. He seemed to regulate after eating dinner (4;45) and almost seemed hyperactive around 530. Worrying that he’s overtired I put him to bed.
Does this occur every night?
Describe his mood and behavior between 4:30-5:30 when you place him alone in a separate room with toys for 15-20 minutes for 2-3 nights (no sibling or parental interaction and no screens).